Day 1 in the US

My first day in the US was not supposed to start early. After all, I had a journey across half the hemisphere. Akash & I had stayed up late night catching up about the past 8 months and our good old days in Chennai. Yet I woke up at 6 am. Not sure if it was due to a new place, or if it was due to the time zone gap. Soon I realized what was wrong. A gigantic figure was sitting next to me, and howling at a laptop screen through his headphones “Madhuri, do you hear me? Do you hear me Madhuri?”

I stumbled out of the bedroom, and found Aki’s other roommate Pradip in the kitchen. I enquired about the gigantic figure I just saw.

“Don’t worry” assured Pradip. “That’s just Garu.”

“What is a Garu” I had to ask.

“Well, that’s just a nickname we have given him respectfully,” explained Pradip.

“And why is he here?” I had to ask

“Well, he was our roommate, who got married and shifted to his apartment. He used to stay in that very room before moving” clarified Pradip.

“But why is he not in his apartment but howling next to me?” I was still wondering

“You see dude, it seems a marriage certificate is mandatory to get a dependent visa these days. Garu had just a 2 week leave to get married. Within that short time frame, he did not get the certificate. So his wife didn’t get the visa.” Pradip sighed “Poor chap, so he comes here every day to video chat with his wife”

“But he can do that from his apartment as well, can’t he?”

Pradip looked shocked “Why should he take an internet line just for himself? He needs it just for an hour every morning and evening. He can use it from here.” He explained “and he pays 20% of the internet charges too”

I understood finally. Pradip made me understand few more things in the next hour. Firstly, I was very lucky to find an apartment to share from my day 1, that too with desi roommates, and specially someone I knew from India. Next, I also understood from him that a dollar was not just a dollar; it was about 45 Indian Rupees. Therefore, we should take utmost care spending each dollar, and wherever possible find means of sharing expenses and reducing expenses. To that extend we should drink soft drinks instead of water and beer instead of fruit juice to minimize expenses. He also explained that we should always cook food and carry it to office, and never buy lunch from outside.

“Now you see the kind of idiots I live with…” yawned Akash, emerging from his room. “That is why I need some sensible roommates like you.” he paused to look at the watch. Next, he unleashed his usual volley of invectives urging as to get ready quickly. “And don’t you dare pack any food for lunch.” He warned, explaining I need to explore the eating options near office.

Our office was at the heart of downtown Seattle, and there was a beautiful view of the waterfront from our 23^rd floor cafeteria. More important that the good scenery was the fact we had a good manager. Satya, our manager, was known as a pleasant person who hardly lost patience with anyone. He was also known as a person who appreciated all his employees without any bias, and mentored everyone’s career. After the initial introduction, he asked me about my goals.

I replied, “I heard that the Seattle downtown has American, Thai, Vietnamese, Chinese, Mexican, Korean, Malaysian and Italian cuisines. I want to try these all in next 2 weeks.”

Satya looked a bit irked with my response “I was asking about long term goals. What do you want to be in couple of years from now?”

I was told earlier that Satya was a manager who always respected honest answers. Therefore, I told him “Being an underweight guy that I am, I want to be heavier by ten to fifteen pounds at the least in a couple of years from now”.

At this point Satya really looked resigned in his endeavor to identify my career path. He just wished me luck with my food hunt and sank to his chair. He was so much shocked by this foodie, I learnt he had spent rest of the day just eating salads. Soon it was lunchtime, the hour I was eagerly awaiting. Akash was busy in a meeting, so I set forth on my adventure by myself armed only with his directions.

After some exploration, I decided to try American cuisine, since it was my first day on American soil. As they say, “When In Rome, do as the Romans do”. I was a big fan of sandwiches and burgers, and the menu looked tempting. Further analysis on the menu revealed to me that a twelve-inch sandwich costs just 20% more than a six-inch one. I also realized that fish was more expensive than all kinds of meat, but the real shocker was veggie sandwich being costlier than meat. Finally, I made up my mind to eat Tuna sandwich, and that is when all the trouble started.

The woman at the counter shot a volley of questions that I could not understand at all. I thought it could be due to accent issue. Therefore, I slowly uttered “T-U-N-A”. She shot the same volley of questions again. I was perplexed, I had told her twelve inch, I had told tuna, what else could she possibly be asking? On her third attempt, I figured out her questions. She was asking if I wanted “White bread, wheat bread, Italian bread or herbs n cheese”.

I was confused. Back in India, I have eaten at multiple restaurants. No one ever asked me whether I wanted basmati rice or Dehradun rice or just boiled rice whenever I ordered chicken fried rice. No one ever asked me options on atta or maida whenever I ordered parathas at a dhaba. But what to do, “In Rome, do as the Romans”. I didn’t want to show that I was new here. I told with an air of importance “give me the ideal bread for tuna sandwich”

She looked very embarrassed “unfortunately sir, we don’t have any ideal bread with us. We do have white bread, wheat bread, Italian bread or herbs n cheese if you like”

I had to surrender. I admitted that I was new and didn’t have much idea about American cuisines. “So you can just give me regular bread” I told her.

She looked even more embarrassed “unfortunately sir, we do not have the regular bread either. But we do have white bread, wheat bread, Italian bread or herbs n cheese. I would be very happy if you like to choose any of these”

I was at the tipping point now. Could not afford to think more on a hungry stomach. I spent my childhood to youth on white breads, so that sounded the safest choice. I asked her for white bread. To my utter dismay, the woman shot another volley of questions. I had told the size of bread, the type of bread, what more could she need to know?

After couple of attempts, I understood she was asking “Mozarella, Cheddar, Italian, Swiss or American”. I didn’t know about the first couple of words, but the last 3 options made it clear. She was asking my nationality. It was a natural question. After all, US being the land of opportunities had a cosmopolitan mix of immigrants from all corners of the planet. I proudly declared “Indian.”

The woman let out an embarrassed smile again “unfortunately sir, we don’t have Indian here. But we do have Mozarella, Cheddar, Italian, Swiss or American if you would like to choose one” she offered.

I figured out she is not interested in my nationality. Nevertheless, what did she want me to choose? Was she offering my citizenship of these countries? However, a sandwich shop hardly seemed a logical place for distributing citizenship of countries, no matter how much easy things were in the land of opportunities. Clearly, this adventure was proving to be tougher than I had thought.

“Give me whichever is good.” I offered my response carefully.

She declared proudly “everything is good sir, if it was not good, I wouldn’t have offered to you in the first place sir. We will be glad to provide Mozarella, Cheddar, Italian, Swiss or American if you like so”.

“When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” I reminded myself. “This is the America, what harm can come out of choosing the word American?” I thought.

The woman was very excited hearing my response, and I saw her taking out a box of cheese from a heap of boxes. Who knew there were so many types of cheese available!

The adventure was not yet over. I had to face few more volleys of questions and every response was bringing me a step closer to my sandwich. At last, I faced the final question “your total is five dollars and thirty cents sir. How would you like to pay?”

I courteously gave her options “well, I have debit card, forex card and cash. What do you prefer?” I asked.

“Anything is fine sir” she replied.

Hereby, I saw my opportunity to settle scores. I gave my reply “Unfortunately Madam, I don’t have an ‘anything’ with me today. I would have gladly used the 'anything' if I had one. What I do have today is debit card, forex card and cash. What do you prefer?”

The bewildered look of the woman stuck in my memory for ages. Well “When in Rome, do as the Romans do” and “when in a sandwich shop, do as the sandwich providers do”!

Destination US

Life kept moving on. Life became easier too. I was working on the same project in which Akash was working from Seattle in the US. I no longer had to reach office by 9 am to talk with my US team. With Aki, I always knew I could call him any time in his night, since he would be up drinking until late night. Once I came to office on a Monday morning and asked him on what to work on. He replied, “Chill man, you have nothing to do for next 2 days.”
I was curious “Why what happened? Did I make any mistake in the code?”
He was nonchalant “no, I finished all the coding over the weekend”.
I was surprised “but I thought the deadline was this Friday”.
He explained, “It was raining all weekend. I did not have any good movies to watch as well. It was boring, so I finished all the coding.”

Then came the shocker “but don’t tell anyone yet about it. Just send an email late evening that you finished everything by today”.
I was puzzled “why do you want to give me all the credit?”

Aki explained, “Our company have nailed a new deal with this client. We are going to need few more programmers here in US. I am going to recommend your name to our manager. So need something brilliant from you to support the recommendation. What better than a dedicated programmer who finish tasks 4 days ahead of schedule?”

I was grateful to him, but before I could express my thankfulness to the fullest, he cut me short, “don’t thank me too much. My roommates are too decent. One of the guys had the misfortune of getting married, so we will need a roomie too. I prefer someone like you to keep the balance; else these decent roomies drive me crazy.”

I protested, “I am not at all an indecent guy. I do not smoke and I do not drink. Neither am I foul mouthed like you are!”
Aki told philosophically “Yet you never attempted to correct me, even for once. Which means secretly you like these activities, and you are as indecent as I am. So deal is sealed.”

Thus, my travel to the US was sealed. On the fateful day, I saw myself standing at the airport with about one hundred people to bid goodbye. Well, bidding goodbye not to me, but to my colleague Malini, who was also travelling in the same route with me to join the same project. Malini was local to Chennai, she was cheerful, smart & popular, and thus most of her neighborhood came to bid her goodbye. She was very proactive as well. Even before the flight could leave the runway and go airborne, she finished her customary weeping and started introductions.

“I am Malini, I am fluent in Tamil, so you don’t have to worry about anything at all” she assured. I was not sure what was there to get worried about in the first place. She apparently read my thoughts.
“Do you know the route?” she asked.
“Off course I do. We go to Malaysia, and then to Los Angeles and finally Seattle” I replied.
Malini went on “and we have a 12.5 hour layover in Malaysia, where the official language is Tamil. Definitely you will need my help there” she declared. “Speaking local language has benefits; I can get better rooms in hotel, or a little better service at the least”

I had to interrupt “why do we need a hotel for the layover. We can just see the city and then catch the next flight”.
She seemed upset “don’t you understand, the hotel is free for anyone with 11+ hour layover. You don’t have to pay anything. The sightseeing will cost money, and you don’t have local currency”.
I tried to logic “we have foreign exchange counters at every airport”.
Malini shot her final weapon “the hotel has all you eat buffet included as well. By my calculations, the dinner buffet lasts 2 hours after we reach hotel, and breakfast buffet starts 3 hours before our flight to Los Angeles”

That was when I realized her smartness. She knew how to convince people. One unlimited buffet was enough to convince a foodie like me, and here were two! Rest of the flight went as expected. Malini kept on weeping & sobbing intermittently for the friends and family she will not be seeing any soon. On the other hand I kept on watching as many Hindi movies as possible as I knew I will not be seeing Hindi movies any soon. Finally, we reached Malaysia. I let Malini take charge. She informed me that our luggage have been through checked to Los Angeles. She has taken the hotel as well as buffet passes also from the airlines counter. She also boasted that she managed to get a limousine instead of regular shuttle bus. I started admiring her “management” skills until we reached the hotel. We learnt we had been given hotel pass for one room instead of two. Malini continued her Tamil conversation with the hotel manager, and few calls to the airlines desk at the airport. She looked very upset, and though details were not divulged to me, I could guess it. Guy and a girl travelling together to Malaysia, and the girl taking command of the situation and not letting the guy speak – everyone thought she was the wife and I was the husband! That is why they did not allot two rooms!

The solution was simple, we had to go back to the airport counter and get the additional hotel pass. “Very simple” I suggested. “You can go to the airport and get the pass while I get started on the dinner buffet”

She got furious “How can you say a thing like that?”

I tried to be logical “I eat a lot, and I eat very slowly. So I am sure I will still be eating by the time you return with the pass and finish your dinner”.

She was not convinced “how can you ask a girl to travel alone to the airport such late in the night?”

I kept trying “you are not any ordinary girl. Remember you know the local language too. Definitely, you can get all the extra benefits and services. Not sure how can I help, I don’t even speak Tamil”

She was not going to give up “what if they don’t believe there are 2 passengers. If they see us both they will believe. If I go alone there is a risk they won’t agree, imagine the situation with only 1 room!”

I tried to explain her that sharing a room with her will not be as bad as missing an unlimited dinner buffet. Unfortunately she didn’t see it that way. Finally, we agreed that we both will go the airport, but before that Malini spoke with the hotel manager to ensure dinner buffet do not get closed till I finish eating!

Rest of the trip went without any further shockers. There were only two incidents worth mentioning. After we got our luggage at Seattle, Malini requested me to push her luggage cart to the taxi and offered to push mine. Upon enquiring I learnt that she has packed two suitcases of 32 Kilograms each, containing cooking utensils and groceries to support her until next year, thus it became too heavy for her to push. The second incident was, Akash somehow was not asleep nor drunk and managed to come to airport to pick me up! Malini did remind me that helping me along the journey was something she did not mind at all. I too thanked her for all her support and help, especially in Malaysia. With that, we parted our ways to our respective apartments.

Sleepless in Seattle : What happens in Vegas

Few days passed. Everyone in the office was excited, since we were about to start the new project. We were going to redesign an application for this client. Most of the experts who had designed the original application a decade back were located in Chicago. Satya chose Akash as our technical lead to travel to Chicago and take knowledge transfer from the experts. A decision, which was going to give him the most scary night of his decade.

Satya came to my desk on the eventful day. He was looking for Akash, who used to sit next.

“Hope you had a nice breakfast, and you are on track towards your long term & short term goals” he remarked sarcastically “now can you tell me where Akash is? I just proposed his name as the technical lead for the new upgrade project”

I did not want to tell him that Akash was drinking until 2:30 am in the night, and probably was still sleeping. Therefore, I just told, “I know he was up till late night, working on multiple things”

“Ah, I see,” mentioned Satya. Just then, Akash hurried inside the office with his typical battled look. Satya got a new verve of energy “Akash, I was looking for you. I have some great update for you”

“Sure, go ahead” Akash mentioned while turning on his computer.

“I have finalized you to be the technical lead working on the upgrade. Please catch tonight’s flight to Chicago, there is a meeting at 10 am tomorrow. The technical experts are going to conduct a workshop for 3 days. Do you have any questions?”

Akash was abrupt “yes, can’t we just have a tele conference?”

Satya looked shocked “You are going to be the face of the project. You need to go in person. Govind, the offshore team, myself – we will be joining through teleconference. Do you have a problem to travel?”

Akash “well yes. I don’t have money.”

Satya “you will get all expenses reimbursed”

Akash “But I need money to make the expenses first”

First time in the history of humanity, Satya was showing signs of losing patience “What do you mean you need money? You do not have a family, you stay with roommates. And you earn a decent salary!!”

Akash went on indifferently “And that salary goes to my bank account via direct deposit”

“So what is the problem?” Satya was almost fuming.

Akash explained, “Well, when I opened my account, I was staying in a hotel. I had given the hotel address as my current address. The bank has a security feature, if the current address is a hotel or PO Box, it sends the debit cards to the permanent address. In my case that is in India”

Satya was bewildered “You mean your debit card is in India?”

Akash declared “Cards! Not card. Every week I used to call the customer support and ask for the debit card, and every week the bank used to send a new card to my hometown in India. It went on for couple of months before I could understand the background.”

Satya was irked “So what was preventing you from updating the address? Now you stay in an apartment”

Akash kept on explaining patiently “every day I think of going to the bank to do it if I have an hour free of meetings. But every day I get pulled into some meeting or another, so couldn’t do it yet”

Satya “you can do it online as well, don’t tell me you didn’t know that”

Akash was ready “off course I know. However, this office computer is meant for project usage only. I can’t use this to browse a non-project related site like my bank account”

Satya almost exploded “I did not mean the office computer. How about personal laptop?”

Akash “they cost about $600, and as I explained, I do not have a debit card to make the purchase of a laptop”

Satya was at loss of words. He never faced such a paradox to solve. He hurried from the room. After a while, he returned with his cheerful triumphant look. “I have authorized you as an authorized signatory on my corporate card. You can use it for all your expenses for next few days till you return from Chicago” he declared.

Akash was convinced, luckily he didn’t throw up any further excuses. He booked a flight and left home by evening for the airport. That was the starting point of our sleepless night.

I got a call from Akash around 9:30 pm. All I could hear were few mumbled words like “Las Vegas”, “flight”, “cell phone” and “charge”. Then his phone dead and I was not able to reach him at all. That’s when all the fun started.

I got a call from Satya after an hour “Hey, where is Akash?”

I started safely “He must be on his way to Chicago”

Satya bursted out “He is in Las Vegas! Dining at some restaurant using my corporate card”

“Are you sure?” I had to ask.

“Off course I am sure” Satya responded indignantly. “I get email notifications for every transaction made on the card I authorized him”

I got an idea “Maybe you can track what tickets he purchased”

Satya sounded convinced and hung up. He again called me after five minutes “He purchased a ticket to Chicago with a stop-over at Las Vegas”

I wanted to give him hope “So he must be having his diner during the stop over at Vegas. In fact he had called me with few words like flight & Las Vegas before his phone died”

Satya was still anxious “But based on the ticket he purchased, he should be on his flight long back and not paying dinner bills.”

I was not sure how to pacify him “ It can be a timing issue. Maybe the transaction posted after some delay”

Satya seemed convinced and hung up. I wasn’t sure what to do though. I knew he was responsible in terms of project work, but at the same time we knew how whimsical he can get at times. Anyway, I had to get ready for the early morning workshop, as I was the only technical lead other than Akash. Just as I was settling into a slumber, I got a call from Satya.

“Your buddy is still in Vegas” Satya sounded depressed “I have tracked his latest transactions. He has taken a cab somewhere in Vegas, instead of a cab to take him to hotel from the Chicago airport”

I was curious “Any idea where he is?”

Satya was assertive “Just now I got another email, he is sitting in a pub at the heart of Las Vegas Boulevard”

I tried to be defensive again “maybe he is eating something” I suggested.

Satya got furious “he ate dinner somewhere at 11 pm worth thirty bucks. Now its 1:30 am, are you saying he got hungry in 2 hours?”

“I heard it’s a desert like place. Maybe he got thirsty and stopped there to drink some water” I tried to explain.

“Well, whatever water your buddy drank in that pub, its worth $45. I should have sent a camel on this project, it would have drank less water” he retorted. “And why is he drinking water in the pub instead of taking his connecting flight from Chicago? The flight had unlimited drinking options too”

I did not know how to defend him. I reminded Satya that if Akash is still partying in Vegas then we need to ensure that we both turn up to the teleconference on time and not dozing from a sleepless night. Satya kind of agreed and went off. But he was having a tense sleepless night. He called me again around 3:30 am to inform me that he has taken a cab and he was hoping it took him to the airport. We both tried to be as happy as possible. But then his hopes were dashed when another email announced a purchase from a liquor store at 4 am in the night. Satya made me google the location of the store, and I found it to be 12 miles from the airport. 

After couple of hours, I found myself dodging sleepily towards the bus stop, cursing Akash as best as I could, as I was trying to reach office for the 7:30 am teleconference. Satya had told me that there were no further transactions since that 4 am transaction. I had assumed that he was still lying drunk somewhere in Vegas.

Finally our workshop started. Satya, looking visibly upset, angry and worried. He kept mumbling to me that he would take all possible disciplinary actions against Akash after this meeting. He opened the conversation with a profound apology. He explained everyone that the technical lead Akash had a personal emergency and could not travel to Chicago. “I really love your sense of humor” replied the client manager with a chuckle. 

Satya looked bewildered and just then the conference room camera at Chicago showed us the full room. “I understand the personal emergency,” he continued “you made this guy travel in such a short notice, that too on a red eye flight” he said patting the shoulder of the guy next to him. 

With great amazement, we identified that person to be Akash. Suited in a navy blue blazer, clean shaved, calm and composed, looking as professional as possible. 

We had no idea how that guy ended up in the conference on schedule. It was only after he returned back from Chicago we got to know the details. He missed his connecting flight to Chicago that night and he tried to spend the night as best as he could. His logic was if he slept, he would not have woken up for the 5:30 am flight, and if he was up all night, without drinking he would not have energy to participate in the workshop properly. “But how did you manage to reach the office without any further transactions?” I had asked. Aki explained that he had taken a bus to the airport instead of cab to kill time. And the airlines didn’t charge him anything extra for the next flight. I still had a question on how he reached the Chicago office without using the credit card. He explained that he befriended a co passenger who was going the same way, and he had dropped him to the office. “Thus” he declared “I may have spent few bucks eating and drinking that night, but I have saved close to $220 in the cab and night stay expenses”.

Satya was elated. The workshop was a success. The client was impressed and we were through. He was so happy with Akash he gave him the blanket “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” pardon, and out of his happiness he forgot to remove him as the authorized user of his corporate card as well! Never mind the "What happens in Vegas" gave us a "Sleepless in Seattle" night, but finally it was "All is well".